I get kindof sick

… when I think about becoming pregnant again. I’d really like to, don’t misunderstand. One more baby, the end of an era, all that. But. The thoughts of thwarting all of the well-meaning yet condescending voices that will surround my scarred uterus makes me nauseous. Truly. There are so many reasons why NOT to have a repeat cesarean, yet the voices we hear are why “TO” have one. The media, the mother-in-law, the mom, sisters, friends, colleagues…

Blogs like this remind me of the fight, the comments, the ugliness that follows pregnant women in our society who don’t play by “the rules”.

But I have fought this fight before. I can certainly fight it again. This next time around though I think I’ll choose my outings more carefully.  I was so happy to be expecting last time after so long that I didn’t arm/guard myself against the inevitable comments regarding my VBAC attempt. Next time I will be more careful. Because The Voices are so powerful, even if we see the sheer lunacy behind them.

3 thoughts on “I get kindof sick

  1. I think about having a baby again a lot. I would be going for a VBA2C. I dont’ want to deal with people though. I wish I could just move away and come back a year later with a baby. (Because I’m thinking about HBAC and I just can’t imagine telling people that and getting their negative reactions).
    I totally get ya there. Me too. Mine would be a HBA2C’s as well. And yes, I’ve contemplated going elsewhere and just coming back with a baby. If only that were an option!

  2. It’s so daunting to contemplate pregnancy and birth knowing that despite all our knowledge and research and insight, we’ll all still be saddled with other people’s fears and anxieties.

    I was lucky (how sad is it that I have to consider myself ‘lucky’) that I was able to have a natural birth in a hospital: it’s practically unheard of! I know, though, that I won’t risk it again, and our next birth will be at home. I also know that I will have to listen to everyone elses’ fear and horror stories for the duration of the pregnancy.

    I think sometimes that I’ll just not publicize our birth plan, yet I feel like I need to be public with our intentions to help deflect those very same fears. I know that I can withstand the onslaught of worry and pessimism, but many women cannot. Maybe by seeing our confidence and success, those same people will be less likely to try to talk other women out of their choices.

    But then I think I’m crazy for thinking that it’ll make any difference. Who knows: I don’t.

    When you are pregnant again, you’ll have positive and enthusiastic voices here, cheering you on!!

  3. I get it too! My last birth was a VBA2C (last one was Inverted T). lol

    This time I’m skipping the care provider altogether, but Shhhh! Don’t tell anyone in my real life. lol

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